Its day 32 in the Big Brother house.

Rich has visited the Big Brother veterinary surgeon to have his teeth darkened. Several aeroplanes have landed in the Big Brother Garden after mistaking Rich's teeth for a runway. The darking is brought about by an application of 'miner's foot' and door hinge grease (the blackest substances known to man) directly onto the enamel of all offending teeth using a charcoal spatula. Rich has also been instructed to reduce the frequency and size of grins after 10.00pm.

Todays task involved collecting a specified amount of urine from various woodland animals in a specified time. House mates failed time after time on their conquest for the warm golden prize, some collecting incorrect substances by mistake. Rich however collected just enough bladder water to gain the house mates their weekly oxygen allowance. An unusal technique of whispering, mild buffeting and back scratching allowed a vast quantity of sunshine liquid to be collected from each animal in turn. House mates were amazed at the intricate and complicated procedure carried out by Rich (apart from Herman who claimed to have seen the same thing done on a video of his Uncles.)

Tomrrow is ketchup day. Get out your flags and burn a tyre.